Group sanctions imprisonment, theft, and murder

An animal-exploiting company called Eggology was recently certified "humane" by Humane Farm Animal Care, the first "liquid egg product" producer to be so labeled. Humane Farm Animal Care is a group, allied with hypocritical animal welfare advocates, that believes that is is acceptable to imprison, steal, and kill without your consent if you are unlucky enough to be a species other than homo sapiens. This is, of course, a boon to the multibillion dollar industry devoted to the imprisonment of, theft from, and murder of other species: the meat, dairy, and egg producers.

The level of absurd hypocrisy is visible from the very first criterion that an animal exploiter must meet to be "certified humane."

• Allow animals to engage in their natural behaviors

Last time I checked, living was an animal's natural behavior. By the group's own standard, no meat can be certified "humane." If I'm not mistaken, the production of milk for calves, and the suckling thereof, is an animal's natural behavior; therefore, dairy production can't be certified "humane."

But of course both of these things are certified, along with the "liquid egg product," because "humane" certification, like all animal welfare reforms, are not meant to benefit the animals, but to benefit the exploiters of animals by making the exploitation more palatable to consumers. The certification of Eggology eggs as "humane" is a great victory for Eggology's profit-making potential, not for the chickens who the company exploits. But try telling that to "radical animal rights groups" like PETA who routinely give awards to companies for their efforts to more efficiently kill and sell animals.

Incidentally, this is made overt in the second criterion for "humane" certification:

• Raising animals with sufficient space, shelter and gentle handling to limit stress

You know what would really limit the stress put on animals? Not fucking using them in the first place!