I was born in 1980, which means pretty much by default that I loved the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a boy. I had a hell of a lot of their toys, at least. Technodrome. Pizza-shooting something or the other. Obscure mutants. Krang. I even had a ridiculous videotape of the Ninja Turtles musical. Anybody else remember that?
Now, two decades later, TMNT is actually the number one movie in America. And yet I have not even the slightest nostalgia-driven urge to see it. I think I always wanted to see a CGI Ninja Turtles movie, but somehow I thought that when it happened it would be different. I think I actually expected, and I can't believe I'm about to type this, a serious Ninja Turtles movie, a reboot faithful to the darker original comic books. Like, an R-rated Ninja Turtles movie.
What was I smoking when I came up with that one?